It's Only 1st Grade Soccer, Man!

First things first, since I don't think I blogged about the last soccer game. If I did, excuse me while I recap. Two weeks ago, my son's team won 4-2 (if they kept score) moving to 2-0 on the season (if they kept track of wins and losses). Oh, and he scored a goal and played a great game.

Last Saturday, they won again, 3-1, and he scored another goal, and should have been credited with 2 goals but the referee blew the half time whistle as he was taking a shot on goal so it didn't count. Why the ref would blow the whistle during a shot on goal is a debate for another day. After all, it's only 1st grade soccer.

Which brings me to the point of this blog entry. It was the 4th quarter, a couple of minutes left in the game, when my 3 year old decided he needed to use the potty. I explained to him that they only had yucky porta-johns and asked him if he could wait until we got home since the game was almost over. Nope, he wanted to use the potty. So I walked him the hundred yards or so to the potty, knowing all the while that once he saw the facilities he would decide he didn't have to go. We get there, stand in line, go in, he decides he doesn't have to go.

We head back to the field and the game has just ended. I walk over to my wife and she says, "did you see what happened?" And since I missed the end of the game I had no idea what she was talking about. She proceeds to tell me that the coach from the other team grabbed my son, yanked him by the arm, and yelled at him for hitting another kid. I asked her which coach it was, and of course, it had to be the coach who had 100 pounds on me. Regardless, I was on my way.

I reached the coach and said, "You don't ever touch my kid." He started making excuses and I interrupted him. "No, there is NEVER a reason to put your hands on a child. EVER."

At this point several parents from the other team ambushed me and started screaming and yelling about how our kids had been hitting their kids the entire game. They are full on screaming and going off. Somewhere in the ensuing chaos, the coach disappears (runs away?) and I'm left arguing with a bunch of lunatic parents.

One guy kept pushing me backward, not hard, but steadily pushing so that I had no choice but to step backwards. I repeatedly asked him why his hands were on me and asked him to remove them. He responded by saying, "I'm not someone you want to mess with." I busted out laughing. Are you kidding me? You're threatening me over a 1st grade soccer match? In front of the children.

Ironically, they argued their way full circle into agreeing with my original premise, i.e. There is never a reason to put your hands on a child. I finally walked away before I made headlines in the local newspaper. I actually, somehow, ended up talking one on one with a parent who wound up agreeing with me once he bothered to listen. We shook hands and were on our way to putting this unfortunate event behind us when another parent decided it was time to get back in my face. These people were unreal.

We eventually made our way to the car and on the way home I found out that my son had been complaining about the other team hitting and pushing him as early as half time. He admitted to punching a kid, but only after he had been hit as many times as he was willing to take.

Thinking back, I remember watching him play in the 2nd quarter, and wondering why he kept looking behind him. Now I realize, he was watching his back. The odd thing is that although this got way out of hand, none of our parents or coaches detected anything out of the ordinary during the game. It just seemed like a normal game, where the kids all cluster around the ball, bump into each other, kick at the ball, sometimes hitting each other, and eventually someone emerges with the ball and heads toward the goal.

No one saw anything that would indicate that the game was getting out of control. The referees never called any player for any physical infraction. It was very much just a typical soccer game. I'm sure we'll all be watching very differently this weekend.

In the meantime, we came home and discussed the events in detail. Agonizing over what happened, how it had escalated, and what we could have done to have prevented it.

My wife talked me out of emailing the league commissioner and informing him of the events. My thinking was that maybe this wasn't the first time (or the last) that this coach had physically assaulted a child and it would be wrong if I didn't at least report the incident so that there would be a record of his abuse. Her thinking was to just let it go, be done with it.

So I didn't file a report, but someone did. We're not sure if it was the referees or a parent from the other team. But our coach received an email yesterday, stating that an "Incident Report" had been filed, and asking for her version of events.

We'll see where it goes from here. My God, it's only 1st grade soccer! And my first encounter with insane sports parents.

My beef was and is with the coach. My intention was to have a one on one talk with the guy, make sure he understood that what he did was wrong, and make sure that if he is going to be coaching children in the future, that he never again let his emotions get the best of him to the point where he feels he is justified in putting his hands on a child. Perhaps I'll still have my say.

And instead of doing the disappearing act, why didn't he get his team's parents under control and man up? I can only hope that the commissioner deals appropriately with this guy.